Yesterday I asked my director about some education pertaining to "new hires" and if I had to take it or could I just submit the completion certificates I have from Community Hospital. She laughed and told me I was way past that new hire stage in fact I was "old" now. I had to stop and think about it, old? Me? But I just got here, or maybe I didn't, but it feels like I just started and then again it doesn't. I get the feeling that didn't make any sense, OK let me explain.
There is still a ton of stuff that I don't know, and patients in this unit I simply have no way of handling myself. It's amazingly scary to me to feel this, for lack of a better word, new again. I have relationships to build with the doctors, and there are SO many of them now. I have given up pretending like I know who belongs to which specialty anymore, I just flat out ask in report.
"Uh what does he do again?"
Right. Then there are the nurses, breaking into a new unit I have learned is like going back to high school all over again. You learn who the "cool" people are, who to and not to associate with and who the class clowns are, and just like on the first day of high school, you belong to no group or crowd and everyone is just watching to see what you do.
On the flip side I've had time to settle in, I at least have learned where most of the supplies I need on a daily basis are located and have determined who I would prefer to be sandwiched between for the night. I am learning who I want with me when a patient goes south and who won't lift a finger to throw you a line when you are drowning.
The thing is now to become a part of the unit. It's happening slowly, there are some who come to seek me out when they need help and a few who actually listen. I've made a couple friends who think of me when outside the building and away from work and a few "work friends". While I may be labeled as old by HR and my director I know I have much to learn and hopefully in time I'll figure it all out.